CHRISTMAS STRESS

One Christmas a long time ago, Santa was getting ready for the annual trip, but there were problems everywhere. Four of the regular elves were off sick, and the trainee elves couldn’t produce the toys fast enough to meet demand and so Santa started to feel stressed. Mrs. Claus told him that her mother was coming for the holidays and wouldn’t be going back until New Year so the stress built up.

Then he went to harness the reindeer. Two were about to give birth and two more were nowhere to be seen. Rudolph had a bad cold and his nose was all red so he didn’t give a s**t anyway! More stress for Santa. Then to cap it all, while he was loading the sleigh a floorboard broke under the weight and a sack fell off and scattered the toys everywhere.

At this point Santa decided to have a fortified cup of coffee to calm himself down. When he opened the cupboard he found that the sick elves had emptied the drinks shelf for their hot toddies. The shock of this discovery caused him to drop his cup which smashed, of course. Cursing he went to the broom cupboard only to find that the mice had nibbled all bristles off the broom.

Just then the doorbell rang so cursing and swearing Santa went and opened the door. It was a beautiful fairy with her gift of a tree. The fairy said cheerfully, ‘ Merry Christmas Santa! Isn’t it a lovely day? I’ve brought you this wonderful tree to celebrate Christmas. Where would you like me to put it?’